Comfort Zone: a place way too cosy to stay in

Today I want to talk about something I recognize in many people: the fear of change.

How many of you are scared just thinking about having to change something in your life? It might be your house, moving to another city or country, changing jobs, changing partners or just changing the bus you usually take to work. Yes. This is all scary. And the most interesting part is that it is scary even when you know that this change is for the better.

As humans, we are all somehow "addicted" to our little routine - our morning routine, the soap always in the same place in the shower, our kitchen, our car, our colleagues at work. We may complain so much about so many things, but when we are used to them, it is even harder to get off from them, no matter how bad they are. And that's the complexity.

Why Do We Stay?

Why are we scared of something that will make us happier? What makes us somehow keep doing and being the same even if deep inside we truly want to change?

You have to go back to those fears and understand them: where do they come from? Why would you prefer a "poor" situation to a new exciting promising one? What holds you back?

Weirdly enough, people stay in situations they dislike because they have made their life around those situations and kind of adapted themselves to them. So to them, getting out feels... scary. Even when the alternative is clearly better.

Step Out

Going out of your comfort zone is the only way to get out of it. Yes, it might be difficult to move out, find a new job, or leave a relationship. But if that is what you need to do, then do it. It will be scary, it will demand a lot of effort from you, but you know that you have to do it and that this is worth it.

DON'T SETTLE FOR SOMETHING YOU DON'T LIKE. Your life is worth more than that. What is the worst thing that can happen? Even if your move is not very efficient, at least you are doing something, moving forward and challenging yourself. You will only get better on the way. By staying where you are without ever stepping out of your comfort zone, that's when life runs away without waiting for you.

Watch Out for Those Who Pull You Back

There are many stories of people who became successful - but their entourage didn't feel good with that, and started criticizing them: "You are not the same anymore" or "you wouldn't have done that before." Those successful people, because they felt unloved, sometimes screwed everything and went back to where they were before.

This shows how important it is to surround yourself with people who truly care about you - who will wish you the best, celebrate your success and help you get there. Negative people often pull you down, and even if they love you, they would sometimes actually prefer you don't change at all. It might be because they are afraid to lose you, or because they can't face their own reality.

Be aware of those behaviors. Have enough belief in yourself to be able to see when that happens. Don't let them limit you at their own expectations.

The Transformation

I am myself struggling with my own limitations. I can feel it, I sometimes block myself for no apparent reason. One thing that helps me get over that is to meditate on it and write in a journal my feelings and emotions about it. It is like peeling an onion - there are so many things you discover about yourself. But as you work on yourself, your transformation is already happening. You become stronger because you understand yourself better.

Every time I kick myself out of my comfort zone, it is so worth it. The reward, the self-appreciation and self-esteem that you get from it, make you want to do it again.

Be positive, willing to change, willing to take on new challenges, willing to improve your life and make it the way you dream it. Anyone can succeed. Don't be scared of what will happen. Only good things happen when they are made with positive intention and love. Success is not about the goal. Success is the journey.

In Love and Happiness,

Stephanie