As I am on a trip to my Paris, I feel like sharing some thoughts about how grateful I am to be able to spend so many quality moments with my grand-mother – called “Super Mamy”, 88 years old – and her younger sister – called “Tantine”, 81 years old.
The more I spend time with them, the more I realize how young and alive their souls are. They have been through so many things in their lives, so many good and bad times. But whatever story they choose to share with us, it is always with the same energy, passion and youth as if it happened yesterday. Their eyes are wide open, everyone can feel their energy invading the whole space and the whole room is filled with sudden passion and young wildness. Age definitely doesn’t impact the eternal soul. They are the living proof of it. Sometimes they make some jokes and start laughing as if they were teenagers, almost embarrassed about it. It is such a beautiful thing to see. Society today makes us think that growing old is bad, that we have to get rid of those lines around our eyes, forehead or mouth, that grey hair looks terrible, that the body of an old person is terrible to see and that youth is the only possible beauty. This actually makes me laugh a lot. I have studied how to read lines on a person’s face and how you can figure out some important traits of character depending on those lines. Those lines can say so much about you, and your past, and when you know and acknowledge that, WOW. I truly find them beautiful. I truly prefer a glowing face, with many expressions, showing off wrinkles that prove what an intense life they have been living, instead of a fix, fake, no-expressions “Botox-injected” face. We are not robots. We are not our physical appearance. We are souls in a human body, and this body is there to make us thrive on Earth. Hiding the beauty of our experience on life is like denying all the emotions and all the important things we have been through. Many corporates want to make us believe we have to hide this, we have to fight off lines and aging signs because we are not worth anything anymore as we grow old. Please take a step back and realize that the only reason for that is to brainwash you and make you think you HAVE TO buy their terrible poisonous chemical products to have some value. You are more than that. Embrace life as it goes. Whether you are 20, 30, 40 or 70. Each age has its own beauty. Growing old, gaining experience in life, is just part of the beautiful journey. Why would we want to stay stuck at a young age and not learning anything anymore? We learn things and become better persons BECAUSE WE GROW OLD. Obviously, if you spend your time denying it, not learning anything anymore, watching stupid TV ads and programs, you won’t be learning as much as you are able to. Again, we are responsible for our own choices and actions. So yes, I am excited to grow old. I am excited because I truly learn something incredible almost every day. Never stop reading, being curious about things, discovering new things. Make time your best friend. Don’t waste your time regretting that time goes by. Make each second count by actually making it worth something.
To me, elderly people are the living proof that life is a beautiful journey. It is like a music you are listening to. Who cares about the final note? It is all about dancing, each note at a time. Sometimes, they start getting emotional when remembering some loved ones who passed away, or some good old times that were so good that they wish they could go back in time. And again, everything that truly deeply impacts them is always an experience, a moment shared with someone, it can be just a magical moment at some point in their lives. Do they get emotional about the superficial goods they have been lucky to have? About cars, houses or diamonds? Not at all. They actually barely talk about it. They might say something to give us some description about a situation or the background of a story, but that’s it. It takes a second and then they tell us about this experience, that travel, or about that laugh with that person, or this embarrassing moment, etc etc. People, LIFE IS NOT ABOUT HOW MUCH MONEY YOU MAKE AND HOW YOU CAN SHOW IT OFF AND SPEND IT. Can money make it easier for you? Maybe. But that’s not what will define you and what will be remembered in your heart as you grow old. What you will remember are the people around you, the love you gave, the love you received, the tears you shed, the way you felt at this moment or that moment. That is what will be stuck in you and what will actually make the person you are. So one lesson I take here is this: don’t bother about the money. Bother about how your heart feels and abundance will follow anyway.
Another thing I would like to add is the courage of elderly people. I have one brother and one sister, they live in Berlin and Madrid, our Mamy and Tantine are in Paris, so we try as much as possible to come and spend time with them so that they know they are not alone. And the fact that they have learned how to use FaceTime and Skype actually changed our lives and it is amazing for them to be part of our lives anywhere we are. But I can see how they can feel lonely at times. Unfortunately, they are often suffering physically because of this or that, and some usual everyday tasks can become quite difficult to do and every day has its own challenges. But they are incredible. They do it anyway. They wake up early, get ready, always well dressed, some make-up (going to buy them some natural organic stuff by the way... ;-) ). They go out even if their hip or shoulder or knees hurt. They go to the groceries store and they started buying ORGANIC food! Coconut oil and Apple Cider Vinegar are now part of their daily routine J They do all those things even if they are in pain. And honestly, they don’t complain much. Obviously some days are harder and they can’t fake it anymore but in overall, they are incredibly courageous and brave. When they start complaining too much, I stop them, telling them to “flip the coin”, I tell them a joke and start imitating them so that they realize. And then they start laughing and immediately forget about their pain. It is actually easy J Again, their heart and soul are SO YOUNG and SO ALIVE. They LOVE TO LAUGH, they know how to laugh at themselves and make jokes about their own situations, and this shows so much.
Do they have some regrets? I suppose so, but they learnt to accept their lives the way it was and they actually love it that way. The good and the bad. I am sure that they know deep inside that everything happens for a good reason. They often say: “This happened blablabla… but actually it is thanks to that that we got there and made that etc etc”. My point is: what is meant to happen is meant to happen. Our only task is to learn from whatever happened. It is when we repeat the same mistakes over and over again that it becomes insane and doesn’t make sense anymore. They know it and actually became really wise regarding this.
Now I am going to share with you what I have learned from the beautiful “older” persons I have been lucky to spend time with in my life:
- My French-British grand-father “Papy de Paris”: Nothing is impossible
- My French grand-mother “Mamy de Paris”: be open and adapt to whatever happens to you, don’t take life too seriously and be ready to laugh any time
- Her sister Tantine: Enjoy life to its fullest, make things happen
- My Spanish grand-father “Papy de Madrid”: It is all about Love. Be true to yourself and give from the heart. Hug people you love
- My Spanish grand-mother “Mamy de Madrid”: work hard, rest hard, and give love as much as you can
This is how each one of them inspired/is still inspiring me.
I am so grateful and feel so blessed that I got to know them all so well, until today for just 2 of them, but still. Those persons have definitely inspired me in many ways, and to me, society should value them much more than what is going on now. They know how life works. They know how to make a good one, they know how you don’t want to have any regrets and they know that Love is all that matters. In a very deep way, not a cheesy way.
So yes, make your life count, be grateful for waking up every single day as it is a new occasion for you to learn and grow and this all gets so interesting! Life on Earth is such a beautiful journey. I am literally loving it. I am loving my ups, loving my downs, and loving the experiences I am having. I am loving my mistakes because I know how to grow from them, and when good things happen it just shows me how life is made to be trusted.
If you are lucky enough to have some older people in your life, spend time with them, help them feel better, and give them joy and happiness and just keep on smiling. They always smile back and that is the best present life could give me at that moment: a beautiful smile on a beautiful older experienced wise wrinkled face.
Have a beautiful growing old life everyone :-)
Stephanie