Free yourself from others' expectations: this is YOUR life

How many times do you say to yourself: “I wish I would do this, but what would YY think about me if I did?”, or “I know this is not making me happy but I can’t stop and change because I don’t want to disappoint YY”.

 

All those thoughts constantly taking over your mind just show that you are living the life that other people want you to live. You are living and acting through their own eyes, opinion and their own values. So many people around me are limiting themselves just because of that. They don’t want to change their life because this would question many deep ingrained beliefs that have been put in their head since they were born.

 

Many people grew up and have lead their lives thinking that they were worth being loved only if they were doing what was expected from them (Conditional Love). Many children grow up like that, and unfortunately this paradigm in them can be a real blockage as they grow up and start to understand that what actually makes them happy is not necessarily what makes the other ones happy. And there starts a conscious – or unconscious – inner battle between the will (and need) to free themselves from those chains and the fear of losing the love and respect of their entourage, or the fear of letting go of what used to be their solid base or referential.

So now the questions is: WHAT IF you did trust your guts and make what you truly know will make you happy? WHAT IF you started something you have always wanted to do, whether your people understand it or not? WHAT IF you could inspire other people to do the same by showing how accepting to change some old belief system can be fulfilling, freeing and above all – vitally essential?

And then the other questions would be: WHAT IF you don’t do it? WHAT IF you stay in your fear, you don’t dare do some changes, you stay blocked where you are? WHAT IF you spend your life putting others’ beliefs as your priority?

Do you realize that one change of mindset can change your whole life, for the better? Do you realize that whatever you decide to do, if this makes you truly happy, and you show confidence in yourself, that people will admire you for that and that you can inspire them? Do you realize that if you do so, no one can really tell you not to do it anymore? It is YOUR LIFE we are talking about. Not the one of your parents, your companion or your friends. Don’t stay blocked due to their own personal limitations. Get over it, show them that you are unique, that you don’t need to do like anyone else, that the most important is to live a fulfilling life with no regrets. And if you feel you are “losing” some love around you, well, that actually can not be that bad: a conditional love is not a true love. People who truly love you will always be around, they will support you no matter what, because they only want you to be at your best.

I went myself through a tough transition in my life, when I changed my career and went from working in the corporate finance world to the Holistic Health world…. Many people around me didn’t take me seriously. I could see a lot of scepticism in their eyes, and some people didn’t even ask me about what I was doing now because they felt uncomfortable with that. But this was typically my fault. If they were reacting like that, it was only my fault, because I was scared of their reaction, I was wondering the whole time: what will they think? Will they still appreciate me? Maybe they won’t value me as much anymore… The truth is, I was the one creating those reactions, as people could feel my embarrassment and were just reflecting it. All my stupid thoughts were haunting me just because I wasn’t confident enough and because I was scared. And then one day, I decided to stop those thoughts. I knew this new passion was part of me, part of my life, and I knew how good that made me feel. So I became more and more confident, being more assertive about who I am, what I was doing and how this change was the best thing I have ever done in my life. And that’s when the attitude of people started to change. They stopped being judgemental, and were rather surprised (positively), and very inspired. Many envy the courage and “luck” I have had to do that. To me there is no luck in life, it is just the law of attraction and how you create your own reality. Yes, some people still don’t ask much about it, and that’s ok. I know it is because it reflects their own perception about their own life, and that many times, they wish they would do the same.

So yes, GO FOR IT. Stop overthinking things, listen to your guts and trust your feelings. If you feel trapped in life, if you are fatigued the whole time, yes it can mean you are physically fatigued, but it also shows that you are being resistant ALL The time. Resistant to your own life and the way you are living it at the moment. So take a step back, and let go of the fears and old beliefs in you. Be honest to yourself, and make the changes now because on your death bed, you might regret it and it will be too late to go back in time.

Hope this will open the doors to positive thoughts for you today,

In Love and Happiness,

Stephanie